yesh....
i'm here finally to blog le...finally gt tym to blog a while le...

haha...

i shall update abt mondae bahx..
mondae went for my 1st dae of attachment at e company somewhere in ajunied wif e name,barracuda technology...

all i can sae after e 1st dae of work is,it SUCKS...i hate it..
btw...it's a fcuking smallk company wif only 4 pple workin including mi n e boss...sianz.. n i start work at 8.30am everydae n end at dunno wad tym but it's definitely after 7pm...
e company is abt making gamin mousepads,light boxes,sign or bill boards etc.....

all i can sae is dat,they're expecting a lot from mi...haiz....
so i cant reali slack much...
sianz...

e timing is wad i hate most,work so long almost everydae den on weekends still nid go back ntuc work, esp now over at e ntuc,e pressure will b solely on mi after yongsheng left e place...

haiz...

i tink i'm gonna suffer from FATIGUE soon le...
i'm still a human afterall n i do get tired...haiz...

will i b able to handle e stress n pressure on mi especially for my attachment and my ntuc de job,i'm lyk e main person whu can reali decide bet success n failures....

all i can sae now is,i'm giving my very best le...
even if i shld fail in e end(touch wood), i'll not regret it....

dat's all for todae le...gonna go eat dinner n most prob go slp le...

tired is e best word to describe mi now... 6:24 PM

hmmm....so long didn't blog le....cos too busy le...
haha...

i shall start wif wad happen on thurs bahx...

on thurs,i have my final presentation for my final year project wif e same 2 assessors n at the end of e presentation,i almost cried,i've already work very hard ever after since wk 6 le...wadever things teacher ask mi to do,i jus do...n yet,haiz.....dunno wad to sae le...i've tried my very best le.....
haiz....
my mood sucks....


den on fri...
nth much happen....

on sat...

went work from 2pm-10pm den at ard 10.40pm,cycle to meet shiou n jack outside e hougang mall de mac,den we walk to jack hse n slack till ard 2am den jiu went home le...
mood still not back yet...haiz....

todae went work at 7am-5pm...

so tired sia...
den todae is also yongsheng de last dae at work le..
haiz...
gonna lose one gd buddy at work le..
e pressure will b on mi now le...

will i succeed or will i fail???

haiz..
dunno wad to sae le..

anyway.,...i wish him all e best in his future endeavours n e new job he's starting...
jia you bahx...

tomolo i starting my attachment le..
haiz...

so sianz...
hope i'll b working a 5 dae wk..

haha...

dat's all for todae...
gonna go eat my dinner n slp le.....too tired le.... 5:53 PM

hmmm...now in sch now...n e 1st thing i wan to say is...

TO HUIJUAN

HAPPY 18TH BIRTHDAE!!!!!...
MAY U RECOVER FROM UR SICKNESS SOON...
GD LUCK FOR UR EXAMS..
N DAT UR LIFE WILL B BETTER FROM NOW ON...
I'LL B PRAYIN FOR U DE..
i've said all dat i wan to sae to u in e sms to u le...



hmmm....

dunno wad haf becum of mi after my quarrel wif huijuan le..but after some deep tinking ytd nite sliently on my own,i believe i've found e ans to it le...
i'll concentrate on wad is impt to mi rite nw at tis very moment n create e miracle dat i nid to pass my fyp at all cost...
2 more daes to my final presentation le....

n i've not been slacking at e rate i was in e last few wks...

havin a calm mind under stress n pressure reali works...
as e moment i've managed to calm myself dwn ytd nite...i found e ans to it...
i will rmb tis for life de..
believing myself is one thing dat i've not reali achieve it over e past few mths...
n i will do it de...

hmmm...it's been a long long tym since i last plae bball le..
haha...
but it's ok to mi de...

haha...

sianz...
jus finish cuttin out a plate for e humanoid robot...
waitin for teacher to give e instructions
so bored now...
sianz....

6pm faster come la..
i wan go hme rest...

haha....

hope my mood will get better as daes pass......











2:24 PM

sianz....
jus wake up..dunno wad to sae le...
haiz...
my mood fcukin bad nw...
had a quarrel wif huijuan on fri...
i dunno y r u treatin mi always lyk dat...
I'M NOT ASKING ANYTHIN FRM U....
y wont u listen to my explanation calmly???
y u always wont calm dwn n listen to mi???
i dun wish to quarrel wif u de...
haf u ever tried to understand mi??
since u dun wan e present i've specially find n bought for U..
it's ok to mi de..
i'll jus throw it away becos other den u,no one deserve it de...

haiz...

dunno wad to sae le..

:'( 10:07 AM

sianz sianz sianz...

everydae so bored in sch...

despite my best efforts...i still cant understand n compare e differences bet e microchips n chose e best among all..
so sianz..

finally,,next wk is e final wk for fyp le..

haha...

everydae is rainin..so sianz sia..
it's been very long since i last plae bball le...i'm missin it so much...

haha...

hmmmm.... ytd after sch go plaza meet wei xiong bro for dinner den at e same tym...i go walk ard n see gt wad i wan to buy for someone de birthdae next tues le...
haha..
den in e end,after walking for quite a while...i found wad i wan le..

haha..

hope dat person lyk it when i give it to...
haha...

den after dat jiu went paradiz n plae lan....1st tym plae CNC 3 n i can sae...i quite lyk it de...

haha...

looking 4ward to e next outing which is dunno when le...

haha..
dat's all for now...

=) 3:05 PM

sianz...
jus came back frm my lunch abt 1 hr ago..

e fcuking back pain is back again le...
fcuk sia..

haiz...

i'll try to tolerate it as much as i can...

from now on...i'll do things my way,my style n no one can stop mi... 2:24 PM

hmmmm.....
in sch now...
sso bored...
i'm e 1st person to reach e lab for 2 consecutive daes le....cant believe it man...
haha....


anyway..
ytd after sch ends at 6pm rush dwn to plaza to meet wei xiong to watch spiderman 3 cos he gt some movie vouchers n is treatin mi to watch though he've already watch it le...

thks bro...

overall...
e show is gd bahx...
i've learned quite a lot of things frm e movie...

haha...

den after e show end at ard 10pm..we went back to hougang to eat our dinner or rather sae,supper at hougang plaza de kopitiam...

haha....

e seafood fried rice there sucks man..tasteless...
regret eatin it...wth...

nvm....

den after dat slowly jiu walk home le.....

reach hme at ard 11.40pm den faster go bath le jiu go slp le..

but...
e same old problem is back le..
findin it hard to slp...
kip on tinking n tinking abt somethings....
n up till now...
i still cant find e solutions to it...
i hate tis kind of life...
i wan change it.......
i noe i haf e fcukin abilities to succeed...n from now on...
i'm going to prove myself......

haha...

nw feelin very tired sia....

later still gt some stupid talk at 3pm...
sianz sia.....

haiz.... 11:22 AM

hmmmm

now eating my fav SA fuji apple...
it's simply wonderful...

e fcukin back pain is back again le....
so sianz...

haiz...

i hate it....
haiz...

is dat e signal for mi to give up???..

haiz... 10:15 PM

sianz...

now at hme nth to do...

feel lyk slping now...but i noe i'll find it hard to reali slp de...

been finding hard to slp for a few wks le...
haiz...
my brain cant seem to get to stop...
it's lyk kip tinkin non-stop abt somethings...
it's been a long long tym since i last haf a gd gd slp le...
i'm in nid of it...
b4 i reali breakdown...frm all tis...

haiz.....

e fyp is coming to an end next wk le...
after dat will b e attachment le.....
another 3 more mths without rest....

haiz...

i dun care wad pple sae abt mi....i'll do it my style n my way..
no one can stop mi....

only those whu reali noe mi will understand behind my every actions....

yup....

life reali so sianz...

haiz... 8:59 PM

haiz....
jus get back frm work...
dun feel so tired at all bahx...
b4 i end work...
i had a great tym disturbin yongsheng along wif my supervisor helping mi as well..
haha...



dunno y...my mood sucks totally after since wed...

on wed....e kind of feeling dat i feel is...
sometyms i reali wonder...
am i reali ur fren as wad u kip on tellin mi dat we're fren alrite etc...???..

everytym when i wan tok to u,u lyk so fan lyk dat....
i reali dunno y r u treating mi tis way.......
wad's e pt of being frens or rather silent frens when things r lyk dat bet us??..
if u gt read my blog..pls tell mi bahx...
for mi now....
the main reason y i'm still working there is becos of u...
i jus wan to see u..
my heart is no longer at e place le...
i've achieve wad i wan while working there n i've exceed my own expectations le...
shld e dae come for mi to leave e place...i'll not haf any regrets at all....
haiz...

life so sucks now...

am i going to be rite again in predictin dat tis will b another miserable yr for mi as or even worst den last yr???..

haiz..

if only my predictions can go wrong for one tym...it'll b gd...

my mind is in e mess now..

tinking of sch..it sucks....
i reali dun feel lyk going to sch le...
i nid a fcuking break now...

haiz...

i'm breaking dwn soon le..
i'm now very very tired le....
haiz... 6:06 PM

so sianz...now in sch...
slack again le..
haha..

i was expecting to enjoy myself ytd at yongsheng de 21st birthdae party at his chalet in downtown east...

how wrong i was...

haiz..

ytd meet sokhua,hui qun,hui juan n another gal at pasir ris mrt there at rd 6.30pm..den after dat we take bus go there lorx,,

overall....
can sae very bored at e chalet...

something happen which makes mi feel sad during e tym n i left at ard 8.30pm..
cos i dun feel lyk stayin there le..

haiz....


reach hme at ard 9.30pm den jiu go slp le...

feelin no mood now..

i've jus too many regrets in life le...
some of which up till now..

i still cant get over it...

i noe i must unleash e fire within mi to succeed cos i noe i haf e abilities to survive against all odds to get e victory dat i wanted..

though i admit dat i can predict wad my action will lead to if i do this or dat...i tend to take risks...

haiz...

sometyms i reali wan to gib up..

but everytym when i wan to..it seems dat there's a inner mi asking mi not to give up n fight till the end....

haiz..

i dunno wad to do le..

whu can lead mi out??
y must all those sad things happen to mi de??..... 5:08 PM

TO EVERYONE OUT THERE WHU WAN TO SAY BAD THINGS ABT MI IN MY BLOG

I GT SOMETHING TO TELL U....

THIS IS MY BLOG N I'M FREE TO DO WADEVER THINGS DAT I WAN TO...

IF U R NOT HAPPY ABT IT...
JUS FCUK OFF COS I'LL NOT GIVE A DAMN ABT IT..
IT AREN'T GOING TO AFFECT MI..

I HAF E RIGHT TO DO WADEVER THINGS I WAN.. 8:49 AM

sianz....now in sch slackin in e lab....

i shall sae wad happen on mondae bahx..

on mondae nite...i went to e ntuc de staff function at e joo seng ktv at braddell heights cc in serangoon...

den went there only drink 4 cans of beer....so less sia..
den at there sing songs n eat buffet...
overall....
it's quite fun bahx...

haha.....

den ytd slack in sch for e whole dae slacking,,,
den early in e morning gt dunno wad stupid photo shoot in e lab den Mr teo sabotage mi n ask mi to volunteer myself lorx..

sianz..

den haf to put a bit of make-up b4 e actual phototaking took place..
1st tym in my life put make-up..

sianz...

den in e nite...

went compass to meet shiou at ard 8.30pm den slack until ard 2 hrs later jiu go hme slp le...

recently...i've been findin it hard to slp peacefully without waking up in e middle of e nite...
sianz..

my brain seems to b tinking abt something non-stop...

haiz...

i noe i'm exploding any moment soon le....

nvm...

for todae....

later at ard 3pm nid go meet the MP teo ser lak session in sch for dunno wad event n how long it last..
fcuk sia,...

i ask e teacher n he sae dunno n dunno..

go to hell la..

cos i nid plan on wad tym to go to yongsheng chalet later den rite now,,,i'm cluess abt it..fcuk sia..
i dun lyk last min planning....

sianz......

life's so bored......
n i hate it...

dunno wad to sae le...

shld i give up? 9:37 AM

another boring dae for mi...

todae work frm 7am-5pm...

overall...work is ok bahx..

haha...

i wan mondae faster come....

so dat i can enjoy le...

haha...

feelin very moodless now...

all i can sae now is...

living a life wif too many regrets sucks...

haiz...

my back bone there pain is back le..

haiz...

dunno whether wan go c doc ornot...

haiz...

dun feel lyk it..if i'm fated to b paralysed,....den jus b it bahx...

haiz... 9:24 PM

sianz...

so bored at hme n in sch...

haiz....

been tinking abt my next step in life for e past few daes....

n i've come to a final conclusion..

from now on...

whoever does not respect or trust mi...
n if u dare touch mi or wad....
i'll show no mercy...

being a nice person is not gd..
it's tym for mi to show the anger in mi le...
n unleash all dat is within mi...

dat's wad i'll do from now on...

working morning tomolo le...
hope dat no pple disturb mi...
otherwise,they'll face my wrath...

i've changed....
n i noe it..

all e things which happen so far in this yr is not gd at all for mi......

i thot dat by gettin a sliver at napfa during e period when i was feeling very dwn esp e event which happen jus e dae b4 e napfa would boost my morale n gib mi e courage to do things again le......

i was wrong abt it....
reali wrong abt it....


haiz...

wad did i done wrong to achieve it??...

haiz...

i reali feel lyk givin up...


haiz... 8:29 PM

sianz....

todae go sch do soldering again le..

so bored..

everydae do e same thing...

haiz...


gettin sick of it le..

hmmm...

i'll b going to e ntuc staff dinner next mondae le..

haha...

can kip drinkin le...den still can sing somemore...


haha...

den next wed still nid go yong sheng de birthdae party at his chalet for another round of drinkin le..


haha...

hope i can enjoy myself on these 2 days bahx...


dat's all for todae le..

haha... 8:34 PM

hmmmm....ytd went to celebrate jack 20th birthdae...met him at compass at 4.30pm wif shiou den went dwn to plaza sing to meet wei xiong n his frens lorx...
haha....
den we went to e mongolian buffet at park mall...
hmmmm....
overall....
i lyk e place n e food over there....
haha....
den haf a great tym over wif jack frens as well as everyone present...
haha...

it's been so long since i can sae i'm enjoying myself...
if only everydae could b lyk dat....
i'm happp enuff le...
haha....


hmmm....
den todae go sch for only a while den jiu go for e stupid outing to chinatown n little india le..

den we left e place at ard 3pm...den in e end,jason,zi soon,jordan n mi chose not to follow e bus back to sch n we on our own,take e farrer park de mrt hme while jordan go work..
haha...


so bored now...

all i ask for is a happy dae everydae....n nth much le.... 6:01 PM